


Personal Development Plan

by A_Damned_Scientist



Series: A Vala-ued Colleague, Friend and Lover [2]
Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: Comedy, F/M, Friendship, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-16
Updated: 2013-07-16
Packaged: 2017-12-20 09:12:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,446
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/885528
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/A_Damned_Scientist/pseuds/A_Damned_Scientist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rodney thought his worst nightmare was the Wraith. He's lived a sheltered life. Sequel to Sitting With Nellie.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Personal Development Plan

**Author's Note:**

> Some mildly sexual content.
> 
> No money made, not mine.
> 
> Thanks to Vinegardog for the beta read.

**Personal Development Plan**

  
  
"Dr Jackson!" Rodney McKay called across the SGC canteen. He was on one of his occasional visits from Atlantis and was pleased to see someone else in there who he recognised and who was, if not exactly his intellectual equal, at least someone with whom he could hold a half-decent conversation for a few minutes.

Rodney had been sitting on his own, working his way through yet another strange American meal, hoping that any number of people he half recognised wouldn’t sit down and start trying to talk to him about something complicated, like his work, about which they knew almost nothing. No matter how long he lived amongst Americans, he'd never get used to their strange taste in edibles. He also just wasn’t in the mood to pretend to have a conversation with yet another semi-educated dolt who assumed that they had anything to say about his work that could possibly be worth his time to listen to or comment on. At least Dr Jackson was unlikely to make such an erroneous assumption.

"Rodney!" Daniel seemed uncharacteristically happy to see him. Normally he was lucky to get anything like such an enthusiastic response from Dr Jackson. The archaeologist said something quietly, out of the corner of his mouth, to the skinny, dark haired young woman he had walked in with and, lunch tray in hand, started heading over to Rodney's table.

Rodney barely noticed that Daniel's female companion planned on joining them before he found her long hand thrust into his line of sight, obscuring his view of his lunch. He looked up into a pair of grey eyes and a broad, almost childlike smile framed by a mane of long, raven hair. She was probably just another over-excited intern on some sort of work experience program.

"I'm Vala Mal Doran!" she announced, glancing rapidly from his face to her hand and back again. Her radiant smile didn’t fade or falter for a second. He took her hand and shook it, seeing as he seemed to have little other choice if he wanted to regain access to his lunch. Her grip was cool and firm: He found he quite liked it, even if it did make him feel a little uneasy.

"Dr Rodney McKay," he half-heard Daniel announce, making him realise he'd been staring, open mouthed and silent, for longer than was the social norm. He was also, he realised, still holding her hand.

"Umm... err..." he blustered, suddenly inordinately interested in his jello.

"And what do you do, Dr Rodney McKay?" he heard her asking. Her voice was low and sultry, her accent English, no, maybe cultured Australian. There was no flag on the shoulder of her BDU, so he realised he would have to remain in ignorance about her country of origin.

"Rodney's another geek," Daniel explained. Dr Jackson was finding something highly amusing - Rodney could tell by the smirking tone in his voice and the rarely seen half-smile hovering around his lips. It was then that Rodney noticed what seemed to be some sort of mark - a bruise perhaps - on Daniel's neck, just above the collar line. Daniel seemed to notice him looking because he self-consciously turned up his collar to cover whatever it was.

"I'm an astrophysicist. Dare I venture to say... yes I do... that I am THE astrophysicist..."

"I thought that was Colonel Carter?" Vala asked with a fair approximation of wide eyed innocence.

"Well, yes, in this facility, and within her own very specialised field, whereas I am more of a..."

"Geek," Vala interrupted, turning to nod her agreement to Daniel who, Rodney couldn’t help noticing, was smirking even more openly now than a moment ago.

"A polymath!" Rodney protested. He paused for a moment, waiting for her to ask him about his work, like they all did. He found, to his surprise, that he was a little disappointed when she didn’t, preferring instead to start eating her... what was that strange stuff on her plate anyway? Some new, weird American concoction, he guessed. He really should have asked the server for more information when he'd got his own lunch.  Between every mouthful of her strange, odoriferous food she locked her eyes on him, smiling a most disconcerting, knowing smile.

"Umm, what is it you're doing in the SGC, anyway?" Rodney ventured. "Val? Val, wasn't it? Short for Valerie?"

"Vala," she corrected.  "Short for Vala." If he hadn’t known better he'd have though he'd heard Daniel Jackson sniggering at that. "I've been helping Daniel." She announced proudly.

"Ah, so you're a linguist? An archaeologist?"

"A larcenist," Daniel supplied. Vala bristled with mock indignation and elbowed Daniel in the ribs.

"Ow!"

"I prefer entrepreneur!" she insisted haughtily. Rodney was slightly relieved to have the pressure taken off him for a second.

"She's an off-world consultant," Daniel added more seriously in a clear attempt to clarify matters and stop their disagreement going any further. That would explain the lack of shoulder-patch. "She really is proving to be a great help."

Vala and Daniel locked eyes for a moment and exchanged a nod and a smile. "Thank you, Daniel."

"Perhaps she can help you this afternoon?"

"Oh, I very much doubt it," Rodney demurred.

"She's rotating through every section on the base. Would you like Landry to order you to...?" Daniel  stared him down.

"Pff, fine, fine, if that's how it is," Rodney harrumphed. He knew how these things worked: he could waste a couple of hours with her voluntarily and with what, for him, passed for good grace; or he could be ordered to babysit her for a whole day.

"Excellent!" Vala bounced on her seat in excitement. "So, Rodney, what are we going to do, then?"

Rodney groaned, rolled his eyes and dropped his spoon in his jello.

'~'

"Sit there, and don't touch anything!" Rodney demanded, pointing to a stool which was situated a safe distance away from any of his computers or equipment.

"But Daniel said I could..."

"And I didn't!" he snapped back.

"You don't even know anything about me - what I'm good at, what I know about!" She protested angrily, refusing to sit on the indicated stool.

"Do you know anything about advanced mathematics?"

"No, not really, but..."

"Do you know anything about astrophysics?"

"No!"

"Then sit down and shut up!" She glared daggers at him. He jutted out his chin and stared back.

After a few seconds a loud klaxon sounded, breaking the impasse. It was almost a relief.

"What's that!?" Vala shouted as the heavy blast door at the entrance to the lab swung shut, sealing them in.

"We're in lockdown!" Rodney explained, striding across the lab to the telephone. He lifted the receiver and dialled the gate room.

"This is Dr Mckay! What is..?" He fell silent, turning to smile wanly at Vala, the receiver still pressed to his ear. She cocked her head to one side in a questioning gesture. The klaxons fell silent, but the blast door did not open. "Recorded message," he explained, waving the receiver next to his head before replacing it on the cradle.

"So, what do you people normally do in these situations?"

"We're supposed to stay put, wait to be rescued." Or killed he thought to himself.

Vala frowned. "But what if..?"

"You're right. Anything could be going on out there. Personally, I'd rather be on the other side of that door than stuck in here, waiting for something to happen."

"Agreed," she nodded resolutely, falling in behind him as he strode across to the door mechanism. Pulling a small screwdriver from his coat, he quickly unscrewed the faceplate.

"You see, what we need to do is..." He looked over his shoulder, distracted by her peering face just inches behind him. "Please can you give me a little space!?"

"That won't work, you know?" She remarked evenly.

"Oh, and what would you know about it?" She shrugged and took a few steps back. "No offence, but opening this will take intelligence, subtlety and not a little... Ow!" He exclaimed as he accidentally touched a wire, jerking backwards and falling on his backside from the shock.

"Here, let me see!" she bustled over towards where he was sat on the floor nursing an injured finger.

"It's this one, can you see? It's going to look really nasty..."

"The lock, not your finger!" She cut him off sharply, deflating his ego with a single stroke. But he was not going to let her win that easily. He stood, blocking her access to the door, although he still cupped his injured finger with his other hand.

"Have you ever had a girlfriend?" She cocked her head to one side quizzically.

"What, umm, I umm, look... err... what's that got to do with anything?"

"I'll take that as a 'no' shall I?"

"No!" He protested. She smirked. He glowered back angrily. He knew exactly what she meant, even if she hadn't said anything.

"Would you like one?" She asked with an evil grin. "A girlfriend?"

Rodney blinked. He knew he was acting like a rabbit caught in a set of headlights, but life had simply not equipped him with the skills or experiences to cope with such behaviour from a woman. Besides, physically attractive though she undoubtedly was, her hair was the wrong colour and length and those facts only served to add to his general discombobulation.

"Umm, err that is very generous of you, but you're not really my..."

"Because I could put the word out. Amongst the ladies on the base. I mean, you're not that bad looking, I'm sure you'd be someone's type."

"Now listen to me miss..."

"Vala."

"Vala. Right. Thank you. You don't seem to have any grasp of what's going on here. So why don't you take your..."

"Don't you talk to me like that! I'm only trying to help."

"I don't. Need. Your Help."

"You couldn’t open the door. You need my help."

"Will you just..!?" The woman was infuriating! It was like being nibbled to death by a horde of guinea pigs!

"Open the door for you? Of course. Stand back and I'll take a look."

Rodney threw his hands in the air in surrender and strode a few steps away from the door, finally allowing Vala to slink up to the mechanism. Maybe he'd get a few seconds of peace and quiet now? A pair of tiny tools, like miniature screwdrivers, appeared in her hands as if from nowhere.

"What? Where did you get those..?" She ignored him, biting her lip with concentration as she poked around in the mechanism.

"You know you really need to..." she began speaking, not otherwise seeming to divert any of her attention from the lock mechanism. "Calm down and stop being so annoying."

"I need to stop being so annoying!?" He spluttered in disbelief.

"If you want to stand a chance of having sex with anyone, yes you do." She turned and grinned at him before turning back to the door mechanism.

"You don't think you're annoying?" He protested.

She shrugged one shoulder as though considering that possibility, although her hands stayed locked in place at the mechanism. "But I can have sex any time I choose."

"You!" He blustered, trying to think of something to say in response to that. He was shocked to find that she had left him momentarily lost for words. "You are the most..."

"Skilled, successful and gorgeous lock pick it has been your delight to know?" She finished his sentence for him, stepping back with a huge, self-satisfied grin on her face. She pushed the door with a single finger and it started to swing open.  "Tra-laa!" She announced, tossing her hair in triumph.

He glared at her for a moment before stepping up to the door. He had to concede, she had opened it where he had only hurt himself.

"OK, well done." He conceded. "Now stay behind me - we don't know what's going on out there," he insisted, gallantry getting the better of his urge to push her down the corridor ahead of him as a human shield.

"Yesss SIR!" she replied with an ostentatious mock salute. He sneered at her then stepped into the corridor.

"Dr McKay!" One of the SGC guards hailed them from further down the corridor. "Are you OK?" The soldier started towards them.

"Fine, fine. What's been going on?"

"Spot of trouble in the gate room. They were all busy there for a few minutes - touch and go, possible foothold situation, but it's all under control now."

"Great. Just... Great." Rodney said to no one in particular, reflecting on the torment he had endured from Vala for the last ten minutes, half wishing that he'd spent the time in the gate room instead, getting scared silly by whatever it was that had happened there.

'~'

"So," Jackson asked, inviting himself into McKay's lab and handing him one of the two coffees he had brought with him. "How'd it go with Vala this afternoon."

"Well." Rodney nodded a few times. "Very well. I managed to teach her one or two things."

Daniel took a mouthful of his coffee, seeming to savour it for several seconds before swallowing.

"Yeah, I heard something like that." Was that a smirk on Jackson's lips?

"She's a smart girl, quick on the uptake, although with a fairly limited knowledge base."

"I'll tell her you said so." Daniel looked him in the eye. Rodney returned his gaze, determined not to back down or show weakness. Besides, he still had weapons in his verbal arsenal that Daniel didn’t know about.

"With the right mentoring, she could go far."

"And I suppose you'd be the man for the job?" Daniel wiggled an eyebrow at him. Rodney's cheeks reddened. He was certain Samantha Carter had told Jackson about his fumbled attempt to hit on her: Jackson rarely wasted an opportunity these days to tease him about good looking female colleagues.

"Actually," Rodney replied, deciding the time had come and relishing the moment of victory. "I told General Landry that I thought her potential would be better engaged by working closely with you. What with her being an expert on artefacts and so forth, rather than being a scientist."

Daniel's mouth flopped open and closed in a satisfying fish-like manner. "I think the General agreed with me. Nice coffee, by the way." Rodney grinned and saluted Daniel with his mug, raising it a few inches in victory. "Oh and that hickey on your neck?" Daniel squirmed, pulling his collar up in an attempt to cover the ripening bruise. "Did you get that from Vala?" Rodney asked with a wink.

 

The end


End file.
